You’ll Always Have A 2nd Home Somewhere.

They said that you’ll never be completely at home again because a part of your heart will always be elsewhere. I guess it’s true. You’ll always miss a bit of this and that. You will sometimes think of the people you met at the other side of the world. The memories you collected will make your heart smile and ache at the same time.

When I was a kid, I dreamed of going to as much countries as I could when I grow up. But when I was able to travel, I visited some places more than once. I thought to myself, re-visiting the places where you had fun the most is not bad at all and it is not a waste of time and money. It is like finding another home in this world. It is like seeing an old friend in a sea of strangers. Familiarity brings comfort.

The more you visit the place, the more people you get along well with in that place. Well, that depends on you. If you are the type to just do some “touristy stuff” on your own or with your travel partner, you will not widen your circle. You’ll miss the best things that could happen while traveling. Okay, I’m not trying to be expert here. I’m just babbling as always. But honestly, having fun with the locals-turned-friends in the strange-place-turned-home is the best thing in traveling.

So why did I change my mind about quantity over quality travel? I figured, there are places that are underrated but amazing and some are over-hyped but are so-so even after paying a thousand dollars to get there and after spending God knows how much time of flying. It’s your own preference that matters. Don’t let others’ list misguide you.

My turning point is Hong Kong. It may be heaven to others, but it is one of the countries I’d say once is enough. I don’t know. I was not comfortable there. Maybe I met some nice people who I couldn’t recall because I could remember more the ones who were not. I didn’t encounter any danger or terrible things, it’s just unfortunate that I find them uneasy to deal with. Maybe it was the weather, or maybe it was just not my lucky day when I was there. I had a good time but it wasn’t warm in the heart.

I learned that it is not the number of countries you’ve been that is important, it is your happiness and the good times worth keeping that really matter.

I remember how I imagined myself traveling to France just to check out the Eiffel tower (for the sake of seeing the famous landmark), leave, and move onto the next European country. I wasn’t even intrigued how it would look like in person. It was just like a school assignment that I have to do and be done with it. But I was awestruck when I saw it. I couldn’t take my eyes off it when it lighted. Have you heard the perception about French people being arrogant snobs? I did since I was in nth grade. I even heard if from a French I met in Dubai for a business meeting. He said that they’re only like that if a tourist’s first words to them are “Do you speak English?” That’s the time they’d speak French hurriedly until the tourist gives up. Of course, they know English.

I spent a few days in Paris and found out that French people suit me well. They’re kind as a matter of fact. I liked it a lot there that I went back in less than a year. And I miss it every now and then.

The big surprise to me is South Korea. I am a Europe fanatic. I am a romantic. I did not consider going to Korea until two years ago. I wasn’t interested at all. After seeing some of the Asian countries, I thought to myself there’s nothing to see in there anymore. I was not interested in anything Asian. I find them all the same. It just happened that my friend is interested in Korean Wave (something to do with Korean dramas and all) and got me hooked to it. I wasn’t expecting anything in the country. I thought I would just go there once and that’s it. But then I fell in love with everything: place, food, and people.

Others would say that it’s difficult to communicate with the locals there. Unexpectedly, I even made a number of Korean friends on my first time in Seoul and visited them again the following year. Actually, I’m more fond of talking to them than with others. Strange is it?

France and South Korea. Totally different countries. Totally different in everything. But I felt a sense of belongingness. A part of my heart will always be with them. They feel like my second homes…

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… And I will never be completely at home in my own again.

TUESDAY TATTLES ㅣ09.01.16

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09.01.16 ㅣ Saturday

I just got back from my one-month annual vacation. I didn’t get as sad as I used to feel whenever I come back here. Maybe because I was too tired with my flight (which was delayed for 3 hours by the way). I arrived at 2:15 am in Doha airport, waited for my luggage for 15 minutes, panicked when one of my checked-in luggage didn’t come out in the assigned baggage belt (Belt number 5) for our flight. I had to go to Baggage Services department to inform them and they advised me that there were a few bags transferred to Belt Number 1. Luckily, I found my bag after waiting for 10 minutes. I was able to leave the airport at past 3:00 am.

I was too tired, stressed, and sleepy to get emotional. I reached home at 3:20 am. I unpacked my bags, fixed my things, put on new bed sheets and pillow cases, washed up, and was good to sleep at 4:30 am. My alarm went off before I even get in a deep sleep and dreamland.

It was 6:30 am. I had to get ready for my 7:30 am work.

Reality kicked in. 11 months of routinary life to me.

Can’t wait for my next vacation…

TUESDAY TATTLESㅣGo Away. Give Me A Chance To Miss You… (But I won’t. Just go.)

Photo courtesy: http://memecenter.com

Fickle-minded. Almost always confused. Yes, I am. *Me: timidly standing in one corner, shyly looking down while slowly raising my right hand.* 

I keep changing my mind and feelings frequently. It’s too frequent that if the biochemical reactions to my mental and my emotional stimuli could roll their eyes or could just simply hand over to me their responsibilities and leave, they would.

I guess my hormones are in constant rotating shift schedule. Or maybe they are too happy to be part of me because I usually don’t mind anything. (I imagine my  hormones dozing off while some are happily sliding and skinny dipping in my bloodstream!)

It’s not because I don’t care or I’m too cool. It’s mainly because I’m just lazy for arguments. “Do whatever,” I’d always say.

If I like you it means I really do. No reservations, no vagueness, and no pretensions. But it doesn’t mean I’d be forever amused with you or I’d always want your company or see your face or hear your voice. No!

I get sick and tired easily and quietly (both literal and figurative). I can’t hang out with the same people everyday or every week or any set schedule. I can’t even talk to the same person for long. That’s why I’m only friends with people I really like, not to those I just ‘kinda’ like.

I always crave for distance. I need my own cave. Sometimes I think I am a man trapped in a woman’s body. You know how men are, right? Most of them, if not all, need their distance without a single thing in their mind.. Blank. Nada. I’m like that.

If I’m being pushed to my limit, I tend to cut connections, again literally and figuratively. I fade out. I can easily drop clingy and toxic pals. Bye, Felicia!

(After reading some articles, I think maybe I’m an introvert. Shoutout to Huffpost! http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/8576530)

 

 

TUESDAY TATTLES ㅣDown In The Dumps.. 8 years ago.

I went through my old e-mails and found some interesting articles I wrote way back. I wonder what was I thinking and feeling while I was writing this. Did I take a bitter pill? Or was it one of those days I was too bored but the words kept popping in my head so I had to type them away? One thing is for sure, I wasn’t feeling a bit of heartbreak then. Strange…

jd

Photo courtesy: http://www.9gag.com

16 February 2007

There are things that are meant to happen.. So don’t blame anyone for the things you had and might regret, even yourself. Yes, even yourself.

When you were much younger, you thought that the world is filled with roses and fantasies. You started to dream.. Each day, your dreams became bigger and bigger. You carefully put them on hold with a plan to realize them when you are ready and capable to accomplish such mature dreams.

You thought that you were invincible, nothing and no one can hurt you, because you were innocent and young. As you grew a little older, you realized that no one has the ability to shield oneself from hurt and pain.

You learned that despite of not doing anything bad or unjust to anyone, there will always be some people who would love to see you down and miserable.

At first you would be surprised that some could promise you their love and treat you like you are their everything; you are their world, you are their life. But after a while, soon before you realize that the world can make you cry and long before you know that someone who had made you believe in dreams and fantasies was just lying, you’d discover that anyone could simply walk out of your life leaving no trace of the promises they made.

You’d suffer yourself from all the heartaches and heartbreaks. The pain would be too much to bear that you could swear you would never ever fall for someone again…

TUESDAY TATTLES ㅣ My “I could have’s” today.

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It’s Monday night. I got to stay all day in the flat. Most hours spent sleeping in my room escaping the “chitchats” with anyone. Okay, I get easily bored with chats-turned-longgg-story-telling; that I have nothing to do with; give me stiff neck; and make me see or imagine hazy shapes that I’d ask myself if I am still awake, just imagining things, or if I’m already in a coma while someone keeps on talking.

So anyway, I am not here to vent out about that.

Let’s start again.

It’s Monday night. First day of Holidays that should have spent unwinding outside with friends. But I opted to sleep the day away and recover from last night’s shenanigans. (translation: just loads of laughter and some social drinks that could pass as a soda. Sigh. I’m getting old.)

I could have spent my day finishing the paper works I took home, or  painting, or drawing. Or I could have cleaned my room! My sexy inner voice whispered to me that I should just lie on my back, watch re-runs of FRIENDS, and eat some chips. Oh that b*tch! I was fooled again. Sorry waistline!

I could have read a book. There is a stack of books on my bedside table begging me to open them. And e-books on my phone screeching to let me know they are still there.

I am imagining things way too much. I could have written a book!

If I want to write a book, I need an inspiration. A boyfriend vacation would be nice; set foot in Europe; dine in al fresco; meet the eyes of a gorgeous stranger..

Okay, stop.

I could have just really cleaned my room. I’d do that tomorrow morning.

Goodnight.

TUESDAY TATTLESㅣSee you at the Crossroad.

Time check: 03:39am. Let me try to write while I’m not in the proper state of mind. I just got home, a little tipsy, and surprisingly in a happy state.

Probably because I was laughing all night with my friends. We laughed at the most random things.

Tomorrow I will check this site to see if I wrote sensible things or if at least my grammars are correct.

Tonight, while laughing with friends, I was thinking about how delicate life is. You can lose it in a fleeting moment.

Enjoy life while it lasts. Laugh at the silly jokes. Nourish your heart with good memories of your family and friends.

Signing off for today.

Cheers!

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